Put Into Practice- The Authentic Self

Well this would be my first post on my blog for my communications class. First of all a brief introduction about my self seems necessary for this topic because the authentic self is just that. You will be learning a lot about me in just one short post. There are so many things that I wish to include that have become a part of who I am.  I am thankful for all of the experiences that I have gone through that have contributed in many ways, both big and small to who I have become up to this point in my life.

I have always been a very family oriented individual. I would consider myself blessed to have been given such an awesome family and support group when others have not been so fortunate. I'm thankful to have had healthy and lasting relationships with my family. It has been a lot of hard work and a lot of time for growth but at the end of the day the love is always there and that is something worth working for. I'm closely associated with family are friends. I have also been really lucky to have had such great friends whom have become so close that they have bridged that gap and are now considered more family than just friends by my standard. Maybe that's because I tend to collect people and relationships, but I would do anything for them. I am the youngest son of four children. Although some would argue that it would make me the "spoiled one", I really don't believe that I fall into that stereotype because I have been raised with parents who have always been a great example of what it means to have a strong work ethic. They have instilled in my siblings and I the characteristics of an ambitious hard worker and by doing so we have all learned to work hard for what we desire and that hard work really does pay off!

In my household we have had the opportunity to learn about the Gospel of Jesus Christ by establishing a close relationship with God and developing faith in him has been a key component in our lives as members of  The Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter-Day Saints. One that has enriched my life ever since my years in Primary (teachings for children) to where I am today as a member. Many people have argued that because I have "grown up" under this belief system that I believe in. I can assuredly say that although that may have  had a significant role in my introductory period, I have come to the conclusion of my own free will and conviction that it is right. Meaning I have learned for my self and made my own decisions un-biased upon the opinions of anyone else. I have always been given the trust and option by my parents to make my own choices. As I grew older I have been able to learn for myself and this is one of the greatest relationships I have with God and his son Jesus Christ. When the time comes for young men in our church to serve a two year mission I was never asked if I would go. I made my choice that I would serve, so I did all that I could to learn and prepare myself of my own free will and choice. The answers I have received from God have been precious pearls that keep on giving! For example, I know the answers to some of the greatest questions that cross the minds of everyone at some point in their lives (even members such as myself). The answers to questions such as Who am I? Where did I come from? What is the meaning of life? and where am I going? The nature of these questions are the ones that run deep within our beings. They are what we learn as Gods plan for his children. The answers to these questions mean more to me now, than they ever have before in my life.

Recently I have been going through some of the hardest trials of my life up until now, some of which most adults haven't even gone through yet (well at least not while in their twenties). Not to invalidate any hardship or trial they have gone through or are currently going through, but these hardships have been particularly hard on me and my family and that is the sudden loss of a loved one. Upon the completion of my two year service as a full-time missionary for The Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter-Day Saints in the Mexico Pachuca Mission,  my dear mother recently passed last November after a courageous battle with breast cancer. Cancer being the least of things I expected to touch my life in such a painful way. I first learned of my Mothers illness shortly after coming home from my mission and never had I been more scared in all of my life. Than in that moment when I discovered the truth of my moms condition knowing the fear of the unknown was almost impossible to bear, especially the thought of the possibility of loosing my mom. I didn't know what to do or how to act. How does one respond to such devastating news? All I could do during that time was to pray and put my faith in God and trust him like I had for all of my life and especially as a missionary in Mexico. Never had I had to have more faith, than in that time of my life. But not the faith of some miraculous cure, but in that of the Plan Of Salvation that God has prepared for all of his children. My faith has been placed in the assurance of truth that families are together forever! That we are his children, that there is more to this life, that we have a loving savior who overcame death so all might live and ultimately that I would see my mom again. No matter the outcome of these circumstances my family and I had found ourselves strong. As you can imagine everything in my life has changed since then and that wasn't the end of my struggles. Its safe to say that I have had the worst experiences of my life happen over the course of the last six months... and it came time for me to get a grip on who I am and what has been expected of me, or more so what I expect for myself over this period of time. I have come to the conclusion that I want to be happy! I know that's what God would want for me as well as what my mom would want for me. So in my own pursuit of happiness a lot of searching has been done and a lot of self discovery. I have been blessed with a positive attitude that is really becoming some what contagious! I have learned that good things come to those that love God and believe in him. The way I have learned this was during that time when one thing after another was going wrong in my life and nothing was going the way I planned or expected. When I really was beginning to think that it was never going to get better, that things were never going to start looking up, I changed. I changed the focus of my attention instead of focusing on everything going wrong and the negative aspects of life. I decided to develop an attitude of Gratitude! I took the resolve to focus on all of the good that's in my life. I learned to put my trust in God and be believing in good things to come and they are actually coming and things are starting to look up! Even in that time amidst all of my hardships and struggles, I let physical exercise and regular gym attendance become a positive outlet in releasing all the bullshit of life that I had experienced.  I gained 15 pounds of lean muscle over the course of 5-6 weeks, what a bonus self confidence booster haha. I really could tell how having a positive outlook on life was changing my attitude. I began to feel better, happy even.

The reason I think self disclosure lead to a better understanding of yourself is because it allows you to reflect on your life, to speak your mind, and to better "cope" with life experiences that just get too hard and heavy to carry on your shoulders alone. I've learned that life is meant to be enjoyed and not just endured. Yet while sharing is something that is too hard for most people to do because of what ever reason they are afraid of sharing the things that run on the deepest levels for them, whether that be fear of rejection, the feeling of inadequacy that people would judge them if they only knew this or that about their lives. These negative thoughts and feelings halt our personal progression. When people come to terms with who they are, that they have so much potential to become their best selves and all that they need to do is tap into that potential and realize they have to be accountable for their lives up to that point.  That self realization leaves room for growth. Nobody is perfect. They can only be as perfect as they know how to be at each stage in their lives. Through our trials and experiences we are constantly learning and growing. Self reflection or being true to yourself allows room for growth as you inspect areas where personal improvement is to be made. Self disclosure can be helpful in helping someone face their troubles and to accept whatever hardship the are going through and with that eventually start to heal.

For me, I have always been an open person about my thoughts and feelings. I have found it imperative to be genuine and my same self. No matter where i am or who I'm with., this has strengthened my relationships with others because friends often come to me and talk to me about things that have been bothering them because they know that with me. They will feel comfortable being a little vulnerable because they know  how I am genuinely interested in how they are doing and will assist in any way i can. Maybe they feel they  can share with a judgement free zone.  A big reason I think that vulnerability is critical to that authenticity is because of the sense of that judgment free zone. It allows you to have the ability to really connect with others.

I have been told time and time again that "I wear my heart on my sleeve". I use to think that maybe that was a bad thing, that by making myself vulnerable I would be giving people "room" so to speak to walk all over me.  But I find now that it helps me to be personable with others and maybe connect with them on a level that they might be encouraged in their life. I love to help people!Aalthough vulnerability can be a scary thing at times, the idea of putting yourself out there and hoping that someone loves and understand you is very scary and intimidating... but the way of life has become so impersonal that love and vulnerability could be whats missing in helping people connect with each other and strengthen those relationships that they have with others whether it be at home, work, or with friends. I have found that based on my mission experience that people can be more friendly, when you reach out to them. Even by showing the slightest interest in them, whether it  just by  simply greeting them! One of the reasons I was interested in taking this communications class was because I have always found communication to be  the strengthening component to that relationship!  One of the agreements I have made with my self now is that i know how to speak Spanish fluently,  to communicate with my now broadened ability to talk to people. I still find it funny the reactions I get while talking to a native Spanish speaker. It seems they think " who is this gringo that thinks he knows Spanish". Maybe they dislike it because they think i am placing them in a cultural stereotype, by assuming they speak Spanish at first. But as the conversations continue they realize that I actually know Spanish and are happy for the communication. I have always enjoyed getting to know people even though sometimes people can be flat out rude and reject even the most polite of greetings, but hey whatever, can't hurt to try right? Who knows maybe you might create a friendship or two.

I have always wanted to be a positive force in this world, so hopefully  someone can benefit from this blog that we are required to make for our communications class. Hopefully people can learn that by begin true to themselves it allows you to be true to others and makes it possible to reconnect with those around you and to strengthen relationships on a positive note. By putting into practice my strong belief of being genuine to others, I feel I am becoming more of my authentic self.